Looking In
by MuldersMamma
Summary: Reyes looks over some old Files...reflects on M&S *easier to read*


From: Jenn www.geocities.com/muldersmamma  
Title: Understand  
Summary: Reyes' view on Mulder and Scully's relationship.  
Rating: PG  
Comments are appreciated at muldersmamma@hotmail.com. Please R/R, I appreciate feedback.  
Spoilers: wow, uhm, lots…Small Potatoes, Triangle, Emily, Never Again, Momento Mori, Per Manum, This Is Not   
Happening, DeadAlive…  
Distribution: That's awesome! I would love the exposure! Drop me a line and let me know where it's going :-)  
Disclaimer: They aren't mine. I don't make any profit from this story yadda yadda yadda….  
Timeline: Recent…after Trust No 1, I guess….I started this before that ep, when there was a lot of doubt about the   
true nature of Mulder and Scully's relationship!  
LOOKING IN  
-By Jenn  
  
  
I didn't really know what to expect when Doggett asked me to accompany him on   
this quest with the X-Files. I can't even imagine what he felt like when   
Kersh gave him the news that he would be the new man on the X-Files a while   
back…I guess it's been more than a year now for him now. And when I stepped   
in, I felt like I was replacing Scully, a feeling I have desperately tried to   
shake.   
  
I knew what the X-Files was long before I landed on them. I heard the   
reputations of Spooky Mulder, and his Ice Queen partner. I knew it was the   
laughing stock of the Bureau...even down at a field office in New Orleans.   
Imagine my surprise when I became the partner in crime. I had to step in   
after years of just the two of them running the division. And I never could   
have foreseen the bond that two people that work together ever had.  
  
"Monica? Are you all right?" John Doggett stands before me at the door to the   
office. "You look a little out of it. Is something wrong?"  
  
"No, I was just looking over an old X-File, one that may help us with this   
case that we're working on now, and I just got to thinking…" I glanced down at   
the open red file folder in front of me.  
  
"What about?"  
  
"Don't worry about it. It was just kind of a random thought. Nothing too   
important anyway," I set down the pen I had in my hand. "Have you come up   
with anything new?"  
  
He sighed, hesitant. "I'm…stuck, to put in bluntly. As much as I hate to say   
it, I don't know where to go from here." He paused for a moment. "I'm going   
to visit Agent Scully at the Academy. Are you comin?"  
  
"You go, I think I'm going to stay here, I know there's something that will   
help us in one of these files. I just can't find it."  
  
He looked at me strangely for a moment. "Are you sure you are okay? That's   
not like you. To stick around and sift through paper work."  
  
"Don't worry about it John, I'm fine. Make sure you give me a call if Scully   
can help you out."  
  
He nodded. I watched him leave as soon as he had appeared.  
  
This "black oil" I have heard so much about has resurfaced again. A woman in   
Michigan reportedly became infected with this virus. The local PD said that   
the incident had been cleared up, and it was an isolated case of some foreign   
African disease, but a few too many things just don't add up.  
  
I closed the open folder in front of me and pushed it away with the rest…a   
stack of about 50 so far.  
  
My eyes lingered down the files, my mind flying over all the cases still fresh   
in my mind. I can't imagine what this would have been like for 7 years. With   
the same person, with same questions coming up over and over again, and never   
truly being answered. I suppose it could have been so much worse if these two   
didn't connect the way they did. I could see when they were together, how   
much the literally completed the other. I can almost imagine the cases by   
reading the case reports.   
  
By reading the files, I got to see what their lives consisted of, essentially.   
Their lives consisted of little else but their work together.  
  
I professional as I try to be, I can't stop from imagining what all these   
cases actually would have been like. The fun they seemed like they had…and to   
see so many of these things…that no one else gets to see.  
  
I smile as I remember the file where a man could change is form...and then   
changed into Mulder and tried to hit on Scully.   
  
Or how majestic actually watching the Queen Anne appear from the mist would   
have been. Actually getting the chance to explore it as they did.  
  
I can see how much Mulder meant to Scully when they began to learn about   
Emily. I just know he was her rock through tha…and how desperately she needed   
him to be it.  
  
Some people say there is a perfect match out there for everyone. How lucky   
these two were to find each other when they did…so young…so right. The   
pairing was meant as a catalyst to sink Mulder…but they could never have   
fathomed what they started when they put these two together.  
  
I personally cannot see how either of them could be with anyone else. And it   
took them so damn long to realize it. Or maybe…they just always knew…?  
  
To be perfectly honest, I felt tears in my eyes when Scully got her tattoo. I   
know that experience was to make Mulder sit up and pay attention. She wanted   
him to see her as a woman. I guess maybe in one of her weaker moments. He   
was too much of a gentleman, and didn't want to tip his hand to allow her to   
feel any less significant.  
  
I flip through some more files, trying to figure out when they actually knew   
what their partnership had become.  
  
If I had to pick on moment, it would be when Scully found out the horrible   
reality of her cancer. The idea of his life without her petrified Mulder. He   
was desperate to do anything and everything he could. He was always bothered   
that it was his fault, and he needed to set it right.  
  
For Scully, I found it harder to pinpoint her epiphanous moment. I still   
think the strong woman that she is, she tried to deny it, even to herself…out   
of fear it would make her vulnerable. It would…change her, somehow.  
  
She definitely was able to admit it to herself when she asked him to help her   
with the fertility treatment. She couldn't picture anyone else the father of   
her child, and I think she had come to terms with it, within her own heart.   
She could not ignore any feelings any longer, and she knew it.  
  
I saw how much it pained her when he was gone..abducted. And when we found   
his desicated corpse out on that land, the desperation and pain and suffering   
I witnessed, and sensed, literally broke my heart.   
  
And when he returned…I don't think there is any other way to describe that   
other than "miraculous." Her prayers cried out became answered…in a process   
which also cemented her faith, in my opinion.  
  
These files…are almost a story. Each file when put in order is a chapter of   
their lives. Because their lives were nothing else.  
  
I just wish that I was able to write the final chapter. It just can't end   
this way…with Mulder gone again, and both of them with so much pain, and so   
much love to share with the other. Scully now so desperately, and visibly   
needing him…  
  
"Monica?"  
  
I snapped to attention.  
  
"John. What are you doing back so soon?"  
  
He looked at me suspiciously, and spoke carefully.  
  
"I ran into Scully upstairs. She was speaking with the Assistant Director."  
  
"Was she of any help?"  
  
"Well, I didn't get the chance to talk with her about it. Monica…you better   
get up there, before she leaves."  
  
I was a little confused. "What are you talking about? Before who leaves?"  
  
"Scully. She's going to be with Mulder."  
  
"…What?"  
  
I could not believe what I was hearing.  
  
"She can't go." I grabbed my phone, and pushed past Agent Doggett down the   
hallway.  
  
"There's nothing you can do, I already talked to her. She's got her mind   
set."  
  
The elevator doors opened before me.  
  
"Something's going on. Something about this just doesn't make any sense. Why   
John? Why now? I have to talk to her."  
  
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END  
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Yeah. So, that's all. Corny, I agree.   
I know she (Reyes) most likely doesn't think like that, but I think I'm just   
trying to get my own thoughts out.   
Reflect, now after the announcement that the show is coming to an end.  
  
Oh well. Review. I'm ready for the flames :) 


End file.
